Brides can find many wedding planning checklists. But there isn’t a checklist for the mother of the bride. I surveyed over 100 mother’s of the bride and I’m sharing their Mother of the Bride Wedding Planning Checklist items!
Mother of the Bride Wedding Planning Checklist:
This is a typical list of responsibilities but please ask your daughter if she would like help with these items before you jump in. In my last post, I talked about the Mother of the Bride Do’s and Don’ts. Remember Ask, don’t tell. Ask your daughter what she would like and what is important to her and her fiancé. Ask how you can help. “What would you like me to do?” “What would you like to do yourselves?” “Let me know if you need help with that.” “Let me know if there is anything I can do for you both.” She might want you super involved, or she could want you to take a back seat.
Before the Wedding:
- Compile guest addresses and help the bride (if she would like) track down addresses. If asked, work with the Groom’s mother to cut the guest list if needed.
- Meet deadlines. Make sure you provide names and addresses on time so the bride doesn’t have to follow up.
- Keep the bride up to date on any address changes that you are aware of.
- Help secure hotel room blocks and hotel arrangements for out of town guests.
- Offer to help the bride with venue and vendor selection – contract review, asking questions, etc. It can get overwhelming and all blend together when you’re visiting multiple venues and vendors.
- Offer to help the bride with wedding dress selection.
- If you’re paying or helping to pay for the wedding, ask for a list of deadlines for deposit, interim payments and final payments so you can plan and make the payments on time. Let the bride know when the payment is made so she can check this off her list.
- If asked, help follow up on late wedding invitation responses. You might even offer to collect the RSVPs and put the responses into a spreadsheet.
- You may be asked to help research traditions and religious or cultural customs.
- Help with the “something old” or “something borrowed”.
- Assist with compiling the Wedding Day Emergency kit.
- Attend bridal showers, rehearsal and rehearsal dinner.
- Offer your expertise when registering for kitchen items, linens and towels. My daughter and I started her registries at Bed, Bath and Beyond and Target with the basics for her kitchen and bathroom. Then the bride and groom went back and registered for the fun items.
- You can offer to receive packages if the bride and groom work and there isn’t a secure place for packages to be left at their house or apartment.
Day of the Wedding:
- Host the cocktail hour if the bride and groom aren’t there.
- Meet and greet all guests… usually the parents of the bride will go from table to table thanking and welcoming guests. It’s a nice touch for someone to stop and say thanks for coming!
- Make sure the bride and bridesmaids eat the morning of the wedding. One mother of the bride made her daughter and all the bridesmaids brunch at her home. It worked well since they all were getting ready at her home and it’s all the bride got to eat all day.
- Have plenty of water on hand, especially if it is hot outside. Don’t forget to offer water to your photographers.
- Help round up everyone for family photos. One MOB said “I wish I had made a list of wedding photos we wanted, because I don’t think we took any of our family with our new son in law in them. We have one of his whole family and ours. But none of just him and us.” Another MOB said, “Any cute ideas for photos, write them out. You’ll forget. Trust me!”
- “Put everyone in the bridal party in a group text so you don’t have to hunt everyone down. This comes in handy while taking pics, making sure everyone is on time, etc.” suggested another mom.
Lastly, relax, you’ve got this. You have raised a strong, confident daughter and she has chosen a wonderful man to walk through life with.
Please leave a comment if you have additional item that should be added to our Mother of the Bride Wedding Planning Checklist!